Do You Want To Hear a Bad Joke?

No real people got offended, I hope.

Araci Almeida
4 min readFeb 20, 2022
Photo by Gian Pietro Dragoni on Unsplash

Beforehand, the joke was on me, so I have every right to tell it as the only person who could get slapped in the face c’est moi. I am not offending any religion or any lack of belief. Okay, so now I’m ready to go.

Where did all this start?

So, I’m primarily an online teacher, or at least that’s what I do for a living — in the Portuguese language, I couldn’t say the second sentence, so here’s an ode to English for allowing me to be more than my job.

Being an online teacher, I get clients from all over the world. I work through a company that gives me students and privately. Anyway, there is always that first, awkward lesson when you meet someone for the first time.

Don’t forget that everything is done behind a screen, so social and cultural skills must be at my best. The person doesn’t know me, and I don’t know them, so it’s all a bit awkward, but I’m always waiting for them with a smile — even if I’m tired sometimes — and I already have a standard speech with me ready to be spoken.

At this point in my life, I have some experience being a tour guide, which was an excellent course in interacting with other cultures — so I thought. However, at that time, at the end of the day, I hated pretty much everyone, and regardless of nationality, people were divided in my head into “stupid tourist” “good tourist.” — And before the joke, because I like movies, I advise you to watch the comedy My Life in Ruins, it tells it all.

Okay, I had another new student somewhere from the “Old Glory” one of these days. It was a different lesson because the man knew so much about the language that my everyday speech was not for him.

So we ended up talking about Portuguese culture. He started talking about Catholicism, and then I did what someone should never do when you don’t know the person in front of you. There I went to say:

“ Well, like any Portuguese, I grew up Catholic, but along the line, I ran away from it. “

And then he asked me:

“Why did this happen?”



Araci Almeida

9 Times Top Writer. Writing about Portugal and the Portuguese language; Pop Culture; Politics, and Power.